To honor!

There are some days that I wonder if we all will ever really know what it means to really be loved. I assume the purest way to feel the unabashed love that GOD has for us is the love I feel for my children. I know the heartache and also the heart joy that comes with loving my children...all of which can happen in one twenty-four hour period...who am I kidding, it can happen in one hours time in my house! When you are the parents of four kids there is a never ending supply of ups ans downs that like clockwork are ever ready to tick tick tick away at your very soul. The amazingness (new word) of it all is that HIS love is just the same, only better. It becomes more prevalent each day, how much of a pain in the neck I am to HIM, yet HE is still here, taking my calls, answering the knocks and forgiving my shortcomings just as often as we parents do our own young ones. Each time I tend to get overwhelmed I try to remind myself that I behave badly also and to further complicate the situation, the circle of life reminds me of the sacrifices made by my dear parents. Then it is my obligation to honor them even when it is uncomfortable or not exactly what I may want to do at the time. This obligation is what I would assume every Jewish mother has used since the beginning of time as well as every other mother. I plan on reminding my precious off spring how lonely I am and how much I miss them when they take too long to visit me. I guess it really depends on the relationship we have with our parents and or our kids. That opens up a whole kettle of fish. I guess the point is by virtue of our place in life, whether we are the kid or the parent we are obligated to be there...happily....joyful...or just be! Even as I say these words I laugh since I know I fall short in my honor of my own mom. The part that really is going to suck is that payback is gonna be cruel...times four. I better start whining now to prepare for the lonely days of my senior years....not that I particularly believe in Karma...but when "what goes around comes around" hits I will be the worst of all the moms...times four. Lord help me to be kinder and more patient....rats!!!! It always comes back to me changing....story of my life!